Vacation Day...

Sun was already hot. It was a vacation day, full of promises, relaxation under the sun and diving into the crystal Mediterranean waters. Everything appeared to be static, but was not. Her voice sounded loud in-between the quietness of the noon, breaking only by the cicadas’ song.

‘Can you really forgive me? Can your soul forgive me? Can you?’

He was half-asleep; he had no idea what she was talking about.

‘What do you mean? What have you done?’ His soul felt the pain… he wanted to scream. He was waiting to hear that she cheats him, she fooled him, that he was no longer the man she had fallen in love. He felt like an iceberg.

She looked the never ending blue waters, while the internal fever was burning her chest. The weight inside here was transformed into a huge dark balloon stopping her breath. ‘I would like to ask you to forgive me for my silent moments, my concrete pain that was never expressed properly, for my constant ups and downs, for my harsh words, when I was in pain… I shouldn’t’t be like that. But, back then, I was blind, inside my egoism, inside the storm I was carrying, you were the only receiver. The easiest victim. And you were there, accepting everything without a single word. And then, the next day… We both allowed each day to trap us, to magnetize us, to deconstruct us. We allowed the hours to keep us away, the obligations and other people’s wishes to cut us off. This is our fault.’

The man looked her and then asked her ‘Why now such self exploitation? Why now such pain my love? My fairy?’ He touched her hair and kissed tenderly her eyes. His love was obvious.

She felt tears to drop from her eyes and she opened the crying door of her heart. Pieces of salt which became mountains, started to crack under the pressure of truth. It was the right time to unlock her hidden emotions and she released the wild animals she was holding all these years. ‘Can you understand what kind of risk is to love everyday? How can somebody hurt you? You know, when you are in love everything is really easy. You feel your heart beating fast, you feel dizzy, you are not hungry... everything is tragically easy. Just like the separation… In between your pain you have some help: You decide and end something even if you have a large part of responsibility in the relationship. But, what about staying and fighting? To work on your relationship with love! To direct you towards evolution… that is something else. It demands enormous amounts of energy, power. If you have feelings for your beloved one, everything is easy. But still, love hurts… ’

And she continued:

‘What if tomorrow is without evolution? If you stop forgiving me, if you stop carrying about me? What if I stop carrying for your existence, for your heart, your pain, your troubles? How should I know that? Who defines it? What about visiting an astrologer, a medium, somebody who can see the future… can he tell me the truth? Or his opinion would be even more confusing… And should I ask a total stranger to see inside my heart? What should I do?’

He drunk some cold water ‘Well, we are getting older together; we are talking about painful truths (some other couples never dare to touch, because these hurt too much). We doubt, we suffer and still, there is something that keeps us together. Maybe that’s the secret. We receive the gift of rebirth from our own ashes, from our pain. That should be love. The duration of the feeling. The fight to be the half of each other…’

He took her hand and they dived into the crystal waters of the Aegean Sea. Throughout the years, it was her turn to feel fear… but they had a secret. They knew they were just humans and they accepted their insecurities. And they knew that love is in parallel, divine and mortal. Some things in life are simple, after all…

(a picture i took from a beloved place here in greece)